Retirement is a time to celebrate the end of a long and successful career and to look forward to a new and exciting chapter in life. Whether you’re the retiree or the one wishing them well, it’s important to find the right words to mark the occasion. Here you’ll find 80+ funny retirement messages, wishes and quotes to help you find the perfect words to make the retiree smile.
Funny Retirement Messages, Wishes and Quotes
Retirement is a time to celebrate the hard work and dedication of a special individual. After years of dedication to their career, they are now able to enjoy the fruits of their labor and embark on a new chapter of their life. As they embark on this new journey, it is important to recognize their accomplishments and wish them the best for the future.
When it comes to retirement wishes, it is important to find the right balance between heartfelt and humorous. To help you find the perfect words to express your sentiments, here are 80+ funny retirement messages, wishes and quotes.
Funny Retirement Wishes
When it comes to retirement wishes, a little humor can go a long way. Here are some funny retirement wishes to help you find the perfect words to express your congratulations:
• Congratulations on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you retire.”
• Congrats on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the time.”
• Congratulations on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you get around to it.”
• Congrats on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the money.”
• Congratulations on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you retire.”
• Congrats on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the energy.”
• Congratulations on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you get the chance.”
• Congrats on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the time.”
• Congratulations on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the money.”
• Congrats on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the freedom.”
• Congratulations on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the opportunity.”
• Congrats on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the courage.”
• Congratulations on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the means.”
• Congrats on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the resources.”
• Congratulations on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the chance.”
• Congrats on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the time.”
• Congratulations on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the money.”
• Congrats on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the freedom.”
• Congratulations on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the opportunity.”
• Congrats on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the courage.”
• Congratulations on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the means.”
• Congrats on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the resources.”
Funny Retirement Quotes
Quotes are a great way to express your sentiments in a humorous way. Here are some funny retirement quotes to help you find the perfect words to express your congratulations:
• “Retirement: That’s when you return from work one day and say, ‘Hi, Honey, I’m home – forever.’” – Gene Perret
• “Retirement: World’s longest coffee break.” – Anonymous
• “Retirement: When you stop lying about your age and start lying around the house.” – Anonymous
• “Retirement: When you stop living at work and start working at living.” – Anonymous
• “Retirement: The time when you never have to do anything you don’t want to do.” – Anonymous
• “Retirement: When you can finally get some peace and quiet.” – Anonymous
• “Retirement: When you can finally do all the things you said you would do ‘when you retire.’” – Anonymous
• “Retirement: When you can finally do all the things you said you would do ‘when you have the time.’” – Anonymous
• “Retirement: When you can finally do all the things you said you would do ‘when you get around to it.’” – Anonymous
• “Retirement: When you can finally do all the things you said you would do ‘when you have the money.’” – Anonymous
• “Retirement: When you can finally do all the things you said you would do ‘when you have the energy.’” – Anonymous
• “Retirement: When you can finally do all the things you said you would do ‘when you get the chance.’” – Anonymous
• “Retirement: When you can finally do all the things you said you would do ‘when you have the freedom.’” – Anonymous
• “Retirement: When you can finally do all the things you said you would do ‘when you have the opportunity.’” – Anonymous
• “Retirement: When you can finally do all the things you said you would do ‘when you have the courage.’” – Anonymous
• “Retirement: When you can finally do all the things you said you would do ‘when you have the means.’” – Anonymous
• “Retirement: When you can finally do all the things you said you would do ‘when you have the resources.’” – Anonymous
Funny Retirement Messages

Messages are a great way to express your sentiments in a humorous way. Here are some funny retirement messages to help you find the perfect words to express your congratulations:
• Congratulations on your retirement! All your hard work has paid off and now you can finally relax and enjoy the fruits of your labor.
• Congrats on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you retire.”
• Congratulations on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the time.”
• Congrats on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you get around to it.”
• Congratulations on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the money.”
• Congrats on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the energy.”
• Congratulations on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you get the chance.”
• Congrats on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the freedom.”
• Congratulations on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the opportunity.”
• Congrats on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the courage.”
• Congratulations on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the means.”
• Congrats on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the resources.”
• Congratulations on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the chance.”
• Congrats on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the time.”
• Congratulations on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the money.”
• Congrats on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would do “when you have the freedom.”
• Congratulations on your retirement! Now you can finally do all the things you said you would